Boundaries are crucial in dealing with a situation like this. Consider blocking your mother’s number for certain periods of time to give yourself respite from the constant dread. In addition, provide her with contact information for organizations like the Samaritans, who can offer support when she needs it.
My 60-year-old mother has lived with depression throughout her entire life, and its profound impact on our family cannot be overstated. However, since her parents tragically succumbed to Covid, her condition has worsened considerably. She has lost her appetite, experiences panic attacks, cries incessantly, harbors resentment towards everyone around her, actively tries to sow discord among family members, and frequently throws tantrums. Despite witnessing the toll her mental health is taking on herself and those closest to her, she adamantly refuses any form of assistance. Both medication and therapy have been dismissed as viable options. As a result, I find myself constantly drained and fatigued, the mere sight of her number on my phone filling me with a sense of foreboding.
Establishing clear boundaries becomes imperative when attempting to navigate through such challenging circumstances. Blocking her number periodically can alleviate the burden of anticipation that accompanies every interaction. By doing so, you create pockets of respite where you can regain your emotional equilibrium and focus on your own well-being. While it may seem counterintuitive or even harsh, safeguarding your mental and emotional health is essential in order to remain supportive to your mother in the long run.
Additionally, it might be helpful to provide your mother with alternative sources of support. Suggesting that she reach out to organizations like the Samaritans can connect her with trained professionals who specialize in assisting individuals facing emotional crises. Such resources can offer her a lifeline when she feels overwhelmed or simply needs someone to talk to. Encourage her to take advantage of these services, emphasizing that seeking help does not imply weakness but rather reflects a proactive step towards regaining control over her mental well-being.
Realize that you are not alone in grappling with the challenges posed by a loved one’s mental health struggles. Seek support from others who have experienced similar situations, such as support groups or online communities. Sharing experiences and strategies can be invaluable, as it provides an outlet for you to express your concerns and gain insights from individuals who have navigated similar journeys.
Remember, caring for someone with unyielding resistance to help is immensely challenging and draining. Prioritizing your own needs and well-being does not make you selfish; it enables you to maintain the strength necessary to support your mother when she is ready to accept assistance. By setting boundaries, seeking additional resources, and connecting with others who understand your predicament, you can find solace amidst the tumultuous landscape of supporting a loved one with depression.
